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This will be my last update ever.
As far as I am concerned, I have pretty much no friends. None at all. So far everyone has been a complete asshole to me and stabbed me in th back multiple times. Not to mention lied to me about it. The only exceptions I know of are
1: Kara
2: James Feole
3: Jim-Daddy
4: Loyd
And that would be the end of the list. There is no one else. Everyone else...
1: Talks shit about me to everyone behind my back
2: Doesn't have the balls to confront me when there is a problem
3: Ditched me for liars
4: Interfered in my life
etc...
You all suck. Period. Maybe you all hate me. You know what, I don't care anymore. I just don't fucking care. I went most of my life without any friends, I'll just end my life the exact same way. I serioulsy cannot trust anyone with anything. So just fuck you all. I am sick of the bullshit. And I am sick of everyone judging my actions. Why don't you look at yourselves for once and leave me and my life alone. None of you will have to deal with me anymore, so just stay away from me. And how about you all just forget I ever existed. It will make us all happier in the long run. If you see me, don't talk to me. If you see me online, don't IM me. Pretend I was never alive. And keep it that way.
~Dark Akira~
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So yeah... it's been a really long time since I updated. I just don't really feel the need that much anymore. Nothing's really too new at the moment. At least not in my mind. My lovely Kara is sick again. And yet again her mom thinks she has the black plague and is deathly ill. She tends to over-react to alot of things. It's kinda annoying. We just got back from having Kara's blood work get done. There really was no need for it too. It's probably gonna test negative, and I'm gonna rub it in her mom's face. Umm... What else is new. Me and Robyn are still together and strong, regardless of what other think. Alot of people seem to thin we broe up, but I guess they're just idiots. Because we never said we broke up. And if we did break up we would mae it crystal clear to everyone we know. I got a new laptop. It was free. I modded the windows on it big time. Looks like a Mac now. Kinda sad really. But it's easier on the system resources. I put in a new shell for windows. The XP one was annoying, so I put in my own and... helped it be prettier. For those of you who ever want to get in touch with me, don't bother calling my house. Or showing up there. I clearly don't live at home anymore. I haven't been there in 2 weeks or so. You have better luc seeing me at school. I made a few new friends. Such as Beth and Eric Fairbanks. They rule. Beth is one of my new best friends. And eric is just a cool kid. We think he has a crush on me. -_- ... kinda odd. But I'm over it. He's fun. So is Beth. Me and Eric fixed Beth's computer yesterday. It was so screwed when we opened it. Apparently since we graduated, telecom has filled up with idiots who cant even put hard drive in correctly. And some how they managed to mae the comp think there is no bios installed when there clearly is. I touched it. Hehe. But we fixed it. After a few hours though. it was sooo screwed. You would have had to be there. One of the fans near the processor was being held in with twisty ties. And the fan that should be blowing hot air out, was blowing in... just...no... I can't belive these people were allowed to touch this thing. Makes me want to cry. ::tear:: ok. I'm good. I got a new cell phone. So for those of you trying to call my old one, stop it. Cause I haven't turned it on in about a month. And I don't plan to. I really don't care if I have messages either. So thats about it in my immediate life.
But in Demonic-RO news. I have shut down the server at the moment. So yeah. You cant get on it. I got sick of certain things. Oh well. But I did make a new homepage for the server. It is prettiful. I like it. Most of the new news is on there. Me and Jim are also building a new server box this weekend for Demonic-RO. So loading times will be better, less lag, and it can support more players by a long run. So it will be a very good thing. i will have fun with it. Hehe. I can't wait till build it. We might mod the tower too. So it is Demonic-RO. Put images and GM names and suff on it. Neon lights...you know. Cool stuff. And I guess thats it for updates. Ummm... yeah. JP if you read this IM me or something. Get ahoold of me. I have to give you something.
~Dark Akira~ Current Mood: Excited... Current Music: Full Metal Panic - Tomorrow |
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Aug. 16th, 2005 @ 03:56 pm
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I have a funny feeling that there are alot of my "friends" that really can't stand me and arent telling me so. You know what. How about you tell me for once? Hmm? There's a friggin thought. Then maybe I'd leave you alone. You ever think of that. If you fit this description, comment and tell me. I am sick of this bullshit.
~Dark Akira~ |
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There is a reason for everything I do and say. Most people will never understand this. That is fine. But if I tell you something or give you my answer, then leave it at that. Don't try doing things anyway or tell me I'm wrong or bullshit like that. I am sick of it and I dont need it. So just stay the fuck away from me if your going to be like that. If I say no, Then don't fucking do it.
~Dark Akira~Current Mood: Pissed Off... |
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So yeah. I drove to Rhode Island yesterday. With Robyn. That was interesting. I went to go see Mandy Cause I love her oh so much. Shes soo cute. Fun to hug. Shes so tiny. Hehe. But I had fun..minus the whole issue after the fact. And the parents. And yeah. But its ok. I got off practically scott free. Hahahaha. I have my ways. But yeah. Oh well. The things I do for my friends eh? It happens. Seeing her was worth all of it. I LOVE YOU MANDY!!!!
1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
15. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?
~Dark Akira~Current Mood: I miss Mandy now... |
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~*~Result nr 6~*~
Your power is: Transformation
Explanation: Unlike everyone else you
can change your body materia and transform into
anything (e.g. an animal). This can be used in
good purposes for infiltrating evil
headcuarters or adjust your physical abilities
by transforming and therefor do better in
battle. If turned to the evil side, a
transfomer could manipulate the "good
guys" by looking like their loved ones and
break them down.
As a person you are dissapointed with life. You
have not so many interests anymore and has
become depressed. Of course you can be happy,
but your happiness subsides quickly and don't
last very long. You isloate yourself from
people since you think they would only hurt
you, but some part just wants someone equal who
understands the pain. When you transform it
gives you freedom and you can be anything but
yourself. You often pity yourself but don't let
people come near and know what's going on with
you. But the thought of opening up and risking
being betrayed is too strong and intimidating
to even try.
Negative aspects: You carry much hate to
the world and yourself and in the long run this
could lead to dangerous thoughts
(suicide/cutting/killing) though the last one
is least likeable since you would probably just
have too much guilt.
What Power is Compatible With You?
brought to you by Quizilla
Jun. 6th, 2005 @ 07:02 am
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| » I think... |
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I think I'm going to be done with alot of friends for a while. There are very few that are trustworthy. Very few. Even the really close ones cannot be trusted. And its really starting to piss me off. So I think I am going to be done with most of them for a while. I'm tired of getting screwed over for no reason. And I'm tired of everyones fucking stories. Pisses me off. Assholes. I think I need some new friends. One's that dont screw me over on a weekly basis.
**Chris, I am not at all refering to you. Just so you dont think so. You are one of those very few that I do trust. This entry is not aimed at you in any way.
**Nick and JP. This has nothing to do with you either. You guys dont cause drama. I trust you both alot.
~Dark Akira~
May. 15th, 2005 @ 03:04 pm
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| » The Weakest Link... |
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Well...as everyone knows, there has been alot of drama. Yes. Fights between even the best of friends. All because of false information that was fed to all of us. But it has ended. Me and Lee have brainstormed for a bit. AND WE HAVE FINALLY DONE IT! WE HAVE FOUND THE WEAKEST LINK!!!! Comment if you think you know who it is. First one to guess gets a prize. Maybe. Or it will just show your smart. Like me and Lee. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
~Dark Akira~
May. 12th, 2005 @ 06:55 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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You know? A good day would be nice about now. But I don't see that coming anytime soon. This really pisses me off. And why do certain people keep getting mad at me lately. I'm not even doing anyhting. I think I should quit life. Or friends. Apparently I suck at both. I think I might have to go back to sitting here by myself again. Doesn't that suck. And here I thought my life was getting better.
~Dark Akira~
May. 5th, 2005 @ 09:15 pm
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| » Worse and worse... |
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Things just keep getting worse and worse this week. Why? Why now? School, more friends hating me again, parents on my ass, need to find a job. I really hate this. I was doing so well. I was starting to be happy. And then all of this. Why? Now I'm back in this fucking depression. And I am really getting sick of it. I have spent most of my life depressed. I don't need even more of it in my life.
~Dark Akira~
May. 4th, 2005 @ 04:12 pm
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| » I think I'm done... |
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I think I am done with people. I'm done caring. I am done trying to help them when they are down. It is very apparent to me that I am useless to everyone. So I am not going to try anymore. It's just wasting my time. And I've wasted enough of my life on other people. They don't want it? Fine. I won't give it. I'm done with it all.
苦痛...悲哀...これらは私の感じである...
~Dark Akira~
May. 3rd, 2005 @ 10:05 pm
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| » THE RICE FROM HELL!!!!!! |
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Did you know that Yokohamas has 2 sizes for take-out rice?
They have a small one, and a Large one...
We found this out tonight.
They are triple the size of a normal take-out rice.
Can you imagine what 8 of these would look like? Can you imagine $50 worth of fried rice?
We can. And we are eating it now.
Me, Randy, Eric, and Nick. took a trip to yokohamas today. We were unaware of this "sized" rice. We got 8. We thought they were standard. We were very fucking wrong. Try to imagine how much rice we have in our posession right now. We have never felt so fat. Screw starving countries. We're fat kids feeding ourselves. Don't make our mmistake. Get the small one. Trust us on this. We wont be back for a month. We have enough till then.
In other news, it was fun fun. Hung out with them. I got Nick first. And randy. I win. Nick's radio broke. We couldnt get it to work. So we bought a new one. That was amusing. We were odd all day. And I had a Knife.
~Dark Akira~
Apr. 26th, 2005 @ 09:01 pm
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| » Warning... |
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I am warning everyone right now. DO NOT PISS ME OFF FOR A WHILE! I am not in a good mood. I wont be in a good mood for a long time. And anything you do that remotly bugs me I will flip out about. Alot has happened lately. And as of right now I am sick of life. And I am pissed off beyond beleif. So leave me alone if you have a feeling you might piss me off. Save us both the trouble...
~Dark Akira~
Apr. 19th, 2005 @ 12:50 am
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| » Quick... |
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This is a quick entry for me to vent briefly. I'm not going to put detail into it because I don't feel like listening to people shit at the moment. But for the most part. I am currently very pissed off. I have been up and down for about 2 weeks now. I hate people. And I am sick of the shit that's going on. LIke I said. No specific detail because I don't wanna hear it. People suck.
~Dark Akira~
Apr. 12th, 2005 @ 10:11 pm
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| » ::Sigh:: |
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You know? I'm just not doing very good anymore. Nope. I was. I was on a roll. Now its all gone. And its really pissing me off. I am so sick of this shit. Like....really. Shop teacher is yelling at me again. I cant come within 10ft of anyone without getting bitched at to get away from everyone. I think I am just going to move into the storage closet forever. Fuck this. I don't need her shit like this. Plus everything with Kara has been really weird lately, Which isnt cool. And I don't know why its happeneing. It seems like she just doesn't want to be around me anymore. I don't know why. Maybe its just me. But I don't know. It sux though. I love that chick. Shes such a good friend. I'd rather not lose her. Kristi has been awesome lately. Which is good. Cause shes the only one not being retarded lately. Shes been really nice to me and stuff. Makes me happy. Shes been a good friend in shop to me. Or at least pretends it well. Who knows... But yeah. Then theres a nice stupid fight with chris and people. Apparently hes mad at me Jenn, and Robyn. Which is stupid. Over a hotel room. He seems to think it was a group decision for him not to stay. When it is entirely the hotels decision. And what they say goes. Not our fault. But he doesnt seem to think that way. Whatever. I am soo sick of this stupid drama. I deal with it all day in shop. I dont need in between my friends as well.So yeah. I am not a very happy kid. I had a very shitty day in shop today. And people suck. I think I need like....new friends. Or something. Cause what I have now is just irritating me lately.
~Dark Akira~
Mar. 31st, 2005 @ 05:03 pm
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| » So yeah... |
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So yeah....
This weekend was ok. More stupid pointless drama over nothing. What a freakin suprise. I think I pissed off Kara today. I kind showed up at her house without warning. But I wanted to give her the easter pocky I got her. I just dropped it off and left. But she seemed irritataed. Sorry Kara. I didn't mean to piss you off. And yeah. Why is it everyone cant just get along for once. There always has to be some stupid thing. ::sigh:: Oh well. Fuck it. I was in a good mood.
~Dark Akira~
Mar. 27th, 2005 @ 09:20 pm
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| » Here is whats up... |
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So yeah. I had alot of fun at Kara's house. Kristi didn't feel well. So we didn't see much of her. It happens. But I had fun with Kara. We went on a long walk. LIke...several hours long around the city. We talked about things. Life stuff. I think I made her feel better. We got alot of things out. It was like a bonding moment or something. I love her. She's so awesome. I'm hoping she feeld the same. Or somewhat like that. I try to be a good friend to her. But I have no idea of its working. I hope it is. Kristi appears to like me now. I hope. Which is good. Her and her friends moved to my table in shop today. It was cool. Made me feel not so lonely. I hate sitting there by myself all day. Gets dull. And depressing. And having sexist teachers who hate me doesn't help at all. Eh. Whatever. But yeah. Kara gave me a good day on sunday. I'm glad shes such a good friend to me. I really needed cheering up on sunday. Bad week. Very bad. But now I am good. And then I went to Robyns briefly. I could only stay for like an hour and a half because I still had to go to North Chelmsford to see Maria and drop off her camera and bag. Stupid maria. But you gotta love her. Cause you know what she did today? She told me today. She got me a prepaid cell phone. For no apparent reason. She said it was for being her friend. That is sooo awesome. So now I have one. And its her old one that I put alot of ringtones on. And I can make more with the composer on it. Nice stuff. Very good. Made todays shitty day worth every minute. It was like the highlight of my day. Hehe. So yeah. Thats all the news for now. But again. Thank you Kara for beingsuch an awesome friend. And I do care about you. I am always here if you need me.
~Dark Akira~
Mar. 21st, 2005 @ 05:11 pm
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| » Hey... |
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Yeah...sooo...I'm really bored. I went to Yokohamas yesterday. It was eh. Wasn't in the mood for it. Plus we had to stand around forever before we got seated. I warned. People should really listen to me on these things. I'm not an idiot. I'm there every week. I know what its like. I'm going to be hanging out with Kara today. Robyn is busy for most of the day. So Kara invited me over. I'm gonna do that. It'll be fun. I always have fun with her. She makes all my problems just go away. It's like super vacation. Or something... But yes. I bought some Bawls. Its gone. Went through it really fast. It happens. Well...I'm off on errands. I have to buy stuff.
~Dark Akira~
Mar. 20th, 2005 @ 11:17 am
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| » Fo all you people... |
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LIsten everyone. I don't care what kind of stupid morals you have. And I don't care what you think is right or wrong. But don't try to pry on me and Robyn's relationship. Yes. I have other friends that are female. Yes I talk about them. Yes i think they are cool or pretty or whatnot. And yes I hang out with them. And you know what?? Robyn does not give a shit. I let her meet all of these people. And she is friends with most of them as well. I don't sneak behind her back. She doesn't care about my friends. So stop asking. Or telling me its wrong to talk about other girls. They are friends. Get it through your thick skulls. We have the longest relationship out of everyone we know. So how about you all fuck off and worry about your own relationships or lack there of. We don't need help from people who can't even maintain their own.
~Dark Akira~
Feb. 27th, 2005 @ 10:51 pm
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| » Tonight was odd..... |
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Well...I went to Kara's finally. It was fun. I guess. I don't know. It was kinda weird. Kristi is being better. Actually attempting to acknowledge my existence. But kinda depressed me a little. Kept making comments about my IM's to Kara. Which is not a cool thing. Plus Kara kept talking about my hair. I didn't really like that. I hate when people try to tease me when I'm just trying to relax. But other than that it was ok. I met their cousin. She was cool. She made me laugh a few times. And she was confused with me. So we both sat there nodding in confusion. I don't know. Tonight caused mixed feelings. Kara looked cute in her glasses. But I think she was much cuter in mine. My frames looked better on her. I wouldn't let her see what I looked like with them on. I don't really like letting people see me with glasses on. I don't like their stupid comments I usually get from people. So yeah. Didn't wear them till I got in the car and started to leave. I don't know if I'm going to hang out with her tomorrow. I'd like to. But Kristi seemed to be trying to get rid of me. So I don't know. I don't like being around people who don't really want me there. It seems to be happening more and more lately. Maybe its just me. I don't know. But Kara showed me a picture she drew of me. It was cool. Had a note on it. I don't remember who wrote it. But it made me think none the less. I tend to do that. Oh well...
~Dark Akira~
Feb. 26th, 2005 @ 12:04 am
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